Women. Politicians. Salesmen. General Managers. What do they all have in common? They lie. Now, everyone lies. But these people do it with impunity. They represent those that have turned it into an art form or a second language.

Major League Baseball’s trade deadline is just a week away. The events that take place over these next seven days will likely have a significant impact on who advances, and how far, this October. However, the actual happenings hardly live up to the hype with regards to baseball’s annual buffet of B.S.

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Did you know there’s actually dozens of different types of lies? I thought that dishonesty was dishonesty. Not true. So in honor of the bluffing and backbiting that has been and will continue to swirl around MLB, I’ve broken down various shades of deceit, and related it to the situation of certain team as it heads into the trade deadline:

(World Series odds in parentheses.)

The White Lie
“Baby, you don’t look like you’ve gained weight. Honest.”

White Sox General Manager Ken Williams has said that he doesn’t feel as if he needs to make a deadline deal to bolster the floundering Chi-Sox. Since the core of last year’s world champions is intact he’s trying to play it cool. Then he goes out and picks up Mike McDougal from the Royals. That’s decent, but I don’t know if it’s the jump start that Chicago (+600) needs. They are 3-9 in their last 12.

The Sin of Omission
An example is when you told your wife that there were strippers at your best friend’s bachelor party but failed to mention that three of them were licking whipped cream off your nipples.

The Angels (+1600) and Padres (+3500) are both desperate for help, but neither is showing a sense of urgency. The Halos need another bat, and have excess pitching and prospects to play with, but they don’t seem willing to ante up. San Diego needs a third baseman – or any offense for that manner, but they won’t part with any of their starters. If neither team makes a move then they’ll be missing a chance at the postseason.

The Exaggeration
“I drank 29 beers last night” or “I hooked up with a girl that looked just like Jessica Alba.”

Just about every MLB team is guilty of this one. In the past month, everyone from Detroit to FC Barcelona has been rumored to have interest in Alfonso Soriano. He is definitely a difference maker but all the false attention is driving up the price. He’s essentially a three-month rental and only about one-third of the teams feigning interest actually have the prospects to meet Washington’s price.

The Half-Truth
Republicans are pro-life. That’s only half true because they’re generally for the death penalty.

The Tigers (+500) are the best team in the Bigs. That still doesn’t mean that they couldn’t use an upgrade, particularly in their lineup. It would be foolish to dismantle their dominant bullpen but they do need to add another stick for a shot at the World Series.

The Jocose Lie
This is lying for the purpose of affording amusement. Like TV shows. Pamela Anderson isn’t really a librarian and Mischa Barton isn’t really in high school.

The Phillies (+7500) are the jesters in this parlor game. They are really trying to convince people that guys like Pat Burrell, Jon Leiber and Tom Gordon are top-notch difference makers. Wow. Any of the three could be a decent pickup, but the Phils are out of the race partially because these guys aren’t that good to begin with.

Lying by Affectation
This is causing a false distraction.

You know Toronto (+3100) moved Shea Hillenbrand, but did you know they are now angling for Julio Lugo? Misdirection. Also, San Francisco GM Brian Sabean is always a wheeler and dealer. Even though the Giants (+3000) picked up the disgruntled first baseman I wouldn’t think for a minute that he was done.

The Fabrication
For months the N.Y. media has been speculating about which corner outfielder the Yankees (+700) will trade for. Or if they need to ditch A-Rod. Or how desperate the Bombers are for another front-line starter.

The Yankees are fourth in the Majors in runs scored and fifth in batting average. They are also eighth in the league in both ERA and WHIP. Hardly dire straits for a team loaded with veterans and All-Stars. They could use another starter, and if Octavio Dotel isn’t 100 percent they’ll need a setup man. But things really aren’t that bad.

The Denial
I think the entire NL West is in denial about the fact that it’s the worst division in baseball. Why be pessimistic when each of the five teams is still very much in the race? Colorado (+6000) is in last place but is only five games out of the wild card. How? You have some daring GM’s in that division (Sabean, Kevin Towers and Ned Colletti come to mind.) Whether it’s adjusting pawns and bishops, I expect this to be the most active division over the next seven days.

But all five teams are also in denial if they think that they can beat my Mets in the playoffs.

The Minimization
“Listen, I know this was your third DUI this week, that your wife left you, that you got fired and that your daughter is pregnant. But it could be worse.”

Hey, the Red Sox (+700) are still in first place and may be the most complete offensive and defensive team in the AL. However, they definitely have some needs. They have three pitchers on the DL and three rookies holding down the bullpen. I expect Theo to pull off something, so don’t buy the Sox’s line that they are “happy with their team the way it is right now.”

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The Black Lie
A black lie is one that is falsely attributed a source. Like when you tell someone the dog made you to kill your parents when really it was Jesus that told you to.

Texas (+6000) has very quietly snuck to within a half-game of the lead in the AL West. Both Adam Eaton and Kameron Loe will be back from the DL soon, so it will seem like the Rangers made a deadline move. They are in the market, but even if nothing materializes they will still be restocked for a stretch run.

Questions or comments for Robert? E-mail him at robert@docsports.com or check out his Insider Page here.