2020 Miami Dolphins Predictions and Season Win Total Picks
Throughout Florida, there is a thin veneer of modernism that belies the grotesque reality of this swampland. The majority of that state is a white trash wasteland dotted by new-construction strip malls filled with gift shops and pain management dispensaries. The entire state is capitalism drawn to its grim, logical conclusion.
Things don’t age in Florida. They just get a fresh coat of paint. And the bright colors and shiny façade are meant to mask the constant, nagging feeling wherever you that Something is Very Wrong here and that just around the corner some nastiness is lurking.
Just look at Florida’s NFL franchises. On the surface teams like the Miami Dolphins, Tampa Bay Buccaneers and Jacksonville Jaguars appear to be normal, functioning, multibillion-dollar enterprises. But it doesn’t take long to chip away that top layer to reveal what we’ve sensed all along; that these organizations are full of frauds and perverts, working a two-bit hustle on the unsuspecting bumpkins fool enough to buy into their shtick.
These teams have no real culture. They are just fodder. Well-paid extras in the annual dramatic play that is a season of national football.
So any positive energy or confidence that I have in toward the Miami Dolphins after this offseason should be taken with a massive grain of a salt; a thick, chunky grain on the rim of a warm margarita, served to you by a waitress that deals MDMA on the side, to be drunk on the outside deck of a Cheeseburger in Paradise that earned a “B” on its most recent health inspection because the inspector’s cousin used to bang the restaurant manager back in high school.
All that aside, there are, actually, some reasons to feel good about where Miami is now compared to where they were 12 months ago.
Heading into last season, I was convinced that the Dolphins had a realistic shot of threatening a 0-16 season. With a new, unproven head coach and a roster purged of anything approaching ‘talent’ from the team that went 7-9 in 2018, they lost their first game 59-10, were outscored 163-26 in their first four weeks, and didn’t win their first game until Nov. 3.
Things were going exactly as I predicted. Then a funny thing happened. Brian Flores, the rookie coach, didn’t let his team quit. He rallied his players, and they vastly exceeded my expectations, going 5-4 down the stretch. And that momentum has seemingly carried into the offseason.
Miami has been able to parlay a wealth of resources – cap space, draft picks, minimal expectations – into a quick rebuild. That has been their primary success over the past year; accelerating the normally protracted NFL rebuilding phase. The Fins haven’t been messing around. They purged the roster. They got the rookie coach acclimated. They drafted their ‘quarterback of the future’. They added veteran free agents. And they have maintained the flexibility to make future moves by not selling out on some ill-conceived attempt at an overnight turnaround.
The Fins aren’t close to being competitive for the division title or the playoffs this season. But they are definitely an improved squad heading into the 2020 campaign.
The problem for Miami, however, is that their schedule heading into 2020 is absolutely brutal. Last season the Fins were able to steal some wins from fellow incompetents like the Bengals or the Patriots backups in Week 17. This season they will have to take on one of the most difficult slates in the league, crossing over against the two deepest divisions in the NFL (AFC West and NFC West). So – much like divisional rival New York – even though Miami is better that progress won’t show up in the standings.
Then there is also the fact that Miami has been the picture of organizational ineptitude for the past 20 years. On the surface it appears that Miami is trending in the right direction. But why should we trust them now after 20 years of failure?
The Dolphins have gone ‘over’ against their Vegas season win total five times in the last seven years. That includes last season. They were outscored by 188 points last year, though, and now they have to face one of the league’s toughest slates. The Dolphins will be better. But it would be another massive upset if they were to clear their bar and get to seven wins.
Take Miami Dolphins ‘Under’ 6.0 wins.
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